The Pool

May 29, 2018

I have a great, zany pal who built a pool around fifteen years ago. She gave me a key to said pool and told me if I ever called ahead, she would take the key back. Thus and so, my children and friends of mine have had free reign. Unearned, but appreciated more that I can say.

I crave a pool. I crave the ocean. I've informed my kids and parents that once the former are out of the house and the latter depart (not that I anxiously await this horror), I'm relocating to a place where the  waves crash in. I've been landlocked far too long.

I am blessed with a teaching schedule that nourishes my soul with time off in the summer. Today, my Drew and I made our first seasonly visit to Debbie's pool. As I jumped off the diving board, it was an absolute gift.  

There is something about being suspended in water that is freeing and magical.

Debbie Jay-Reichert, thank you for this gift. You have no idea what you have done for us.

The Fall

May 28, 2018

Well, I made a big fool of myself today. See, I'm addicted to the sun, so while every other parent on Drew's team sits in the shade, I sit in the sun. I had not had enough to eat. I had one water. I'm an idiot. 

I stood up after they lost and started to walk toward the other parents and saw stars. I fell down, pseudo-fainting, scraped my knees, and created a scene. It was awesome.

The Mavs moms and dads and staff of the Ballparks of America came to my rescue. I slammed water and protein and I'm fine. Good grief. 

I rock.

The Game

May 27, 2018

Tonight I have to endure an endless 13 year old baseball game against a team from Colorado. The parents are incredibly obnoxious and "instructive" to their offspring. Some in heated Spanish. Do parents really think constantly screaming things at their kids is making a difference?

I was sitting behind home plate and finally had to retreat to a remote area. Sitting in my yellow chair, trying not to kill people, another group of kids from the same franchise (yes, there are youth franchises to whom you donate much of your salary) came and stood beside me and blocked my view of the plate. I ended up with my face pressed against the fence trying to see.

At one point, I mentioned to a kid, "hey bud, I was here first," and he moved about 5 inches away. Then another one appeared and blocked me even further and I snapped. I said, "hey dude, I don't mean to be a d*ck, but I was trying to see people bat."

There was zero awareness of the people around them. And I was kind. Sort of. They have no idea of what I am capable. I taught public school, for heaven's sake.

Earlier in the day we got to experience an umpire who undoubtedly fashions himself a comedian and/or the most important person on the planet. You can't make it up!

I am competitive and I am a believer in supporting my kids. But there comes a point when you want to look at some peeps and say "LIGHTEN UP."

We are tied. It's been three hours.

Give me strength.

That's all.

Aunt Diana

May 23, 2018

I've spent the afternoon in the emergency room with my aunt. Aunt Di suffered a couple strokes a few months ago, about which I've written. She has fought back like a champ. I speak to her each day. It is a joy for me.

This seems to be an inner ear debacle and she is home now.

Aunt Diana is the classiest dame on the planet. She is 82 and has worked her whole life with a fervor that only she and my father share. I've always said she is the female version of Dad (but she might be nicer...although, he is pretty great).

I don't like seeing anyone I love compromised in any way. I especially don't care to see my saintly Aunt Di in peril. But the Lord gave us a reprieve today and she appears to be rolling on.

Word to the wise: the day my Aunt Di goes on to her great reward will be among the hardest of my life. I hold on for her to stay as long as she can. I would appreciate it.

The Loop

May 17, 2018

I think I've developed a disorder.

Unless I already know and like you, I have issues.I wish liked people more, but I don't. As Tom Segura says, "I'm  all friended up."

I'm grateful for everyone I know and love. And I do enjoy meeting and knowing students each semester.

But I am introvert at heart. Walking into a room of strangers makes me want to vomit. Lately I've become about three steps from a recluse. Kids, home, fella, dogs. That will do. The rest wears. Me. Out. I long to be different. But in my advancing stage of life, so I am.

I'm 44 and I'm afraid I'm going to be that lady who hoards sardines and keeps cats. Except I hate cats, I worship the sun, and I exercise. Maybe I'm not in peril.

I suppose the message is this: I hope you're in my loop. I am glad you are. I am grateful. If not, lately it seems like a tight fit. 😉 I'm trying to make some room. It's not in my wheelhouse. But I'm trying.

Who knows...anything can happen.

Peppy

May 14,  2018

My memory of my Papa tonight is amped up. I posted a picture of some roses in my yard and my cousin referenced the roses he grew. Papa was my Mom's dad.

Papa smoked a pipe. In my little 6-year-old  memory, Papa was about 7 feet tall. He was a kind man. He had a dog named Peppy. He would feed good food to Peppy. In Dad's mind, it was like in the movie "Moonstruck" when Olympia Dukakis tells her father-in-law "old man, if you feed those dogs another piece of my food, I'm gonna kick you 'til you're dead!"

My Dad never really felt that, but he also never understood the love between Peppy and Papa. When Papa died suddenly around Easter of 1981, Peppy went crazy. He just wanted Papa back. So did I.

Peppy stood at the door and waited for Papa to come home. He was never the same.

I always cook extra meat to feed my dogs. I know it's nuts. I think there is something to it beyond my weakness as a dog owner. I think, maybe, with every scrap, I'm channeling Papa. I hope he and Peppy are hanging tight now. I am confident, after all these years, Papa is still sneaking Peppy steak in the afterlife. I certainly hope so.