Sunday, June 28, 2015

Conversations in the Hallway...with a pic or several



June 28, 2015

As I maneuvered my way through several years of public school teaching, this is the title I chose for what I saw as a central theme of my professional life.

My best teaching took place in the hallway:  I met students there for the first time, hauled them out for some one-on-one counsel, waited there during tournaments for debate rounds to end and judgments to be rendered, eavesdropped through paper thin motel room walls during room check, delivered harrowing reprimands as needed.

In the hallway I plead with more than one gifted debater--usually in the early stages of brilliant careers--not to quit. It didn't always work, and I didn't always try. But think Tom Hanks telling Geena Davis "it's the hard that makes it great" in A League of Their Own, except it wasn't war time, I can't play baseball, and my tactics tended to run at a 50/50 success rate. 

When I would request (ok, demand) an audience of one with a student in the hallway who was a) tap-dancing on my last nerve b) jacking up the stellar academic climate always fostered in my classroom (yep...always), or c) was obviously not getting "it" done (whatever "it" was on that particular day), 9 times of 10, the conference uncovered an unmet need or a brokenness somewhere in that kiddo's life that was manifesting itself in any or all of the aforementioned criteria for a hallway chat. In the hallway I learned that kids are rarely a**holes just to be a**holes. Something triggered douchebaggery, and once I found the trigger and they knew I knew, they were douchebags no more (at least not to me). And sometimes, if I was really lucky, I could find a way to somehow meet the need or mend the brokenness--even if just for a day. Of course, some kids really are just a**holes. Bless them. I preferred to assume the former until they proved me wrong.

In the hallway, I tried to convince a sophomore in my introductory speech class (which I lovingly and ironically dubbed "penitentiary prep," a descriptor I stole from my mentor) after another defiant day wherein he pledged, once again, to kick someone's ass, that there are people who live entire lives without physically fighting. He didn't believe me. That reality wasn't his and he was sure it never would be. The following year, when he dropped a backpack in the commons of another school in town and the backpack housed a loaded gun that fired, I realized our chat was futile indeed. But I still believe he was among the 9 of 10. He was just so badly broken, I'm not sure the pieces will ever be mended.

This is just a glimpse.

The tales I've stored up these past couple decades I always promised myself to immortalize in writing. So, at the completion of my time at the helm of a terrific speech and debate program, I tiptoed into the blogosphere. What I found was that life kept happening, and the catalogue of old stories was quickly being eclipsed by new ones. And thank God for that. 

Interestingly enough, this forum has become my own little virtual hallway, complete with the same attempt at resolution, (sometimes) reprimand, laughter, tears and understanding I often discovered outside my classroom door.

My gratitude for conversations in the hallway past and present is without end. 

Thanks for joining the conversation.





An intense hallway moment during which I conveyed to poor Dakota (who proceeded to qualify to nationals twice) that being late to the final round of Congress was unacceptable. I am told that my eyes--when pointing out room for improvement in my debaters--could be quite terrifying. What can I say? They worked...most of the time ;).




Recreating Dakota's ass-chewing his senior year. He now serves in the Navy. 




My first year as head coach. This debate room had one electrical outlet, no air conditioning, and the walls bordering the hall did not extend all the way to the ceiling. My kids learned to debate over the roar of the lunch traffic.  Needless to say, our hallway chats lacked the requisite privacy. But that didn't stop me.





In 2008, the national tournament was in Vegas. That's right, a dozen teenagers and me on the strip. In this wedding chapel in Caesar's Palace, I "married" Cassidy Miller (her dad was my predecessor at Parkview). She placed 8th in the nation in Oratory that week. We remain close friends...but the marriage didn't last ;).




When the only time to see your babies is at tournaments, you take them with you. My school kids treated my kids like royalty.



Nationals in snoozy Wichita. It can be a long week, and I apparently felt the need to rest up at dinner.



John Thornton was the funniest and weirdest genius I've ever met. He often snuck up behind me as a character of his own creation. I'm on the phone here and he is just being John...but not.




My corner of the universe from 2006 until I left. We moved into this renovated chemistry lab in '06 and finally had more than one computer and more than one electrical outlet. We also had air conditioning. It was nice to teach without sweating through my drawers at least four months out of the school year.




Nationals in 2006 in Dallas. This was the end of the perfect season: we won every tournament that school year.  The guy holding the trophy is now the head debate coach at Texas Tech. Alongside him are now lawyers, doctors, altruists, moms, dads. All are lifelong friends of mine.


The largest senior class of my career. Another heartbreaking goodbye, but worth it to spend four years with these gems.



Zack Perry (left) was my only four-time national qualifier and double-state champ. He is here with his Duet partner, Beav, in 2011. He assisted the squad after he graduated. Two great guys.




My last real Nationals. We are in Birmingham. In 2009, Nationals were also in B'ham and my minivan collided with a City Bus. No one died, I got sued, and I spent the rest of my career more afraid than I had been before. I had glimpsed into how one awful moment can change everything. Looking back, it was probably the beginning of my end. But on this night, all that melted away. What a redemptive week this trip to Alabama turned out to be.


More pics to come...does my heart good to see these smiling faces again...
















Friday, June 26, 2015

The Wait's End


June 26, 2015

Tonight I got a call from a former student of mine.  He was a product of the early years of my career (bless him), and is undoubtedly one of the most clever, intelligent, kind, classy people I’ve ever met.  For nearly a decade we soldiered through life with nary a word one to the other.  Life had taken him hither and yon, and here I remained in my post at Parkview.  But in the past year we have reconnected, and in every exchange with him I feel like I am swirling about in an era long past, in a country across the sea.  In fact, I’m quite certain the two of us could be plopped down in a drawing room at Downton and fit right in, save the corset, the blue blood, and the fortune.  The bottom line is that we are each the president of the fan club of the other. It’s not a bad gig.

His life has not been easy for a variety of reasons, not the least of which is that he is gay. Here.  

The Supreme Court ruling today was historic.  For a host of my closest friends, it was personal. I’m not at all interested in debating the politics of gay marriage or what this ruling means or blah blah blah.  I am interested in the fact that some of the best people I’ve ever met have a freedom and a right for which they have longed and long fought.  I love them. Their happiness is mine.

For this friend and former student, it was a monumental day. He told me he just had to speak to me, that he and his partner plan to marry September 1, and that my presence on his side of the aisle would make the day complete.  Done.  

We promised to meet soon and we will.  After we hung up, I sat in the dusky light out back, and I felt a sob swell up.  It started in my heart.  I love what he means to me and I to him.  I love what this means to him.  As the sob ran its course and after more surfaced in its wake, I laughed.  Hot damn, I thought.  He’s happy.  And he's not alone.  

“Maybe you think you’ll be entitled to more happiness later by forgoing all of it now, but it doesn’t work that way. Happiness takes as much practice as unhappiness does. It’s by living that you live more. By waiting you wait more. Every waiting day makes your life a little less. Every lonely day makes you a little smaller. Every day you put off your life makes you less capable of living it.”
― Ann BrasharesSisterhood Everlasting

Today, the wait ends.  

June 26 Nugget


June 26, 2015



“A thing is mighty big when time and distance cannot shrink it.” 

― Zora Neale Hurston, Tell My Horse: Voodoo and Life in Haiti and Jamaica

Thursday, June 25, 2015

Still Run



June 25, 2015

It's been a strange day.


It started with the Baptist Bible School day four, which featured the game of "grabass" (as my Dad would say) in vast supply. The kids were punchy, literally and figuratively; and I was over it, literally and figuratively.  Next I went to a meeting for one of my new pseudo jobs coming round the bend, after a solid year of being job-free. It's a surreal feeling. Finally came the birthday party of a dear 3-year-old (see "Glimpse Back") who belongs to one of my best friends. I found myself a bit annoyed (but worshipful!  shout out to the Lord!) at the outset of this day, intent but lukewarm in the middle, and joyful, sad and frustrated at the end. As a matter of fact, I was so twisted up by conflicts around me that are not mine (not mine!) that I quickly returned home from the Mickey Mouse party, threw on my running garb, and ran and ran until darkness stopped me. I wished the darkness away. If I could just keep running, I thought...

But we can never run far enough or fast enough to escape the ailments in our hearts, minds, bodies. And enough about my silly day. People I love dearly are fighting real ailments of heart, mind, body. They aren't running. They fight, each in their own way. 

From my strange day of bits and pieces to real need that is all around me, I pray.  And I found these words that fit:

"The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong." --Gandhi

"Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage."  --Lao Tzu

"The world breaks every one and afterward many are strong at the broken places."  --Ernest Hemingway, A Farewell to Arms

Here's to forgiveness, love and strength.

How did the strange day end? It is still, with hope that keeps on running.

PS--


It takes a special God to get me in two hospital bed sheets pinned together to authenticate Biblical times in Galilee. This is my little crew who, for a moment, were also still.







Wednesday, June 24, 2015

Whither Thou Goest


June 24, 2015

Ruth 1:16 "And Ruth said, Entreat me not to leave thee, or to return from following after thee: for whither thou goest, I will go; and where thou lodgest, I will lodge: thy people shall be my people, and thy God my God."

In this Old Testament story of famine and struggle, Ruth is speaking to her mother-in-law, Naomi. Both women have been widowed and face grave difficulty. But both believe in God. In commentaries I have read, it is clear that Naomi was willing to face whatever journey or fate awaited her alone. It is then that Ruth delivers this powerful request and pledge.

I am not sure when this particular scripture struck me the first time. It may have been in a Baptist Sunday School class years ago. Or perhaps it was in my own meanderings through the scripture. Most memorable, however, was this scene in "Fried Green Tomatoes." Ruth and Idgie are best friends, but Ruth is in a horribly abusive marriage. When her mother dies, she sends this scripture to Idgie.

http://www.metacafe.com/watch/an-Tpr6J77JbhYmn/fried_green_tomatoes_1991_ruths_mother_died/

What I love about the relationship between Ruth and Naomi is that it is pure, and purely a matter of choice. Neither woman is obligated to the other lawfully or even culturally. There is a love here that is not demanding, but rather pleads not to go. And it's followed by the promise to stay. Forever.

God makes many promises to us. What I love about this one is that thousands of years ago, he set forth an example of human commitment that mirrors that which we may have with Him, and obviously a belief that human beings are capable of this type of devotion. It need not be formal. We can choose it, and we can mean it--to God, to another. Forever.

Tuesday, June 23, 2015

la bella luna

June 23, 2015

This is the view from my backyard tonight. The moon in the light of the sun...



"We all live under the same sky, but we don't all have the same horizon."  --Konrad Adenauer

Monday, June 22, 2015

June 22 Nugget


June 22, 2015


She had always wanted words, she loved them; grew up on them. Words gave her clarity, brought reason, shape. 
Michael OndaatjeThe English Patient

This was the time in her life that she fell upon books as the only door out of her cell. They became half her world. 
Michael OndaatjeThe English Patient



Sunday, June 21, 2015

Out of the Weeds

June 21, 2015

"I couldn't live without you, Toby. I mean it. I'd be in the tall grass. I'd be in the weeds."


President Jed Bartlett spoke these appreciative words to his Communication Director, Toby Ziegler, in an episode of "The West Wing." It was no small acknowledgement.

In my classroom at Parkview there was a green pillar just next to my desk. One side of the pillar was visible only from the one spot in the room that the kids couldn't claim. On it I placed pictures, quotes, reminders that helped me make it through each day. That quote was among them. When I read it, the people in my life who kept me on the fairway flashed through my mind. In doing so, they were with me. Every day.

This Father's Day, I am reminded of those words. The excellent fathers I know--including my own--ARE that quote to their kids (grown or not) and likely to a great many others. Good dads take care. They keep us out of the tall grass. Out of the weeds. Or, if we find ourselves there, they find a way to help us out.

Happy Father's Day to those exceptional dads who have made exceptional people who are equipped to dream big and stay their own course. And to my Tobys near and far who help me be better than I otherwise would be, I couldn't live without you. 


Saturday, June 20, 2015

Pops


June 21, 2015

He didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and he let me watch him do it.
--Clarence Budington Kelland


When my dad retired from a 50+ year career as the grand poobah of Missouri State University athletics in 2009, for the Springfield paper I wrote an article about his role as grand poobah of our family. His retirement was on the heels of Father's Day, and it was published at that time. As this Father's Day approached, I found and reread it. I don't think I could say it better today than I did then. So here 'tis.

On Dad's 75th birthday, I put together a video of his life. It can be found in my google+ profile ("view my profile" below, Dad;)).  It was one of the best gifts I've ever given.

To my Pops, thanks for letting me watch you live. And for making us your life.

Happy Father's Day




Nuh-VAY-duh

June 20, 2015

Nevada, Missouri is a cultural Mecca a handful of miles from Kansas, nearly equidistant between Springfield and Kansas City. As is our custom in the Show-me state, we pronounce it nuh-VAY-duh. We also pronounce a little town called Versailles just as it's written (ver-sales) rather than the globally recognized pronunciation of Versailles (as in the French town, the Treaty of). But I digress.

I have spent many first weekends in January in Nevada as a debater and then as a coach. Nevada has had a proud speech and debate tradition in spite of its small population and hosts its annual tournament on that weekend, which usually also features record low temps or ice storms. In my first year as the assistant coach at Parkview at age 23, I drove a 15-passenger van full of students to this tournament only for the sky to unleash a fury of ice pellets on Saturday afternoon through which we were forced to slide home. I remember distinctly how desperately I had to go to the bathroom on that 4 hour trip that would take less than two hours in non-life-threatening circumstances. I was afraid to stop and leave the skating rink/interstate, so I soldiered on, stomping my left foot in bladdered agony while the brilliant Eleni Tsolakis (a junior in high school who was a dead ringer for Natalie Portman) distracted me with conversation and Fiona Apple songs. I will now humbly admit that my bladder only half made it, and when I finally got home, I peeled off my insulted navy suit slated for immediate dry cleaning in shame and relief. You do what you must: the lives of some of our best and brightest were in my hands, folks. And I'm not proud.

There is limited lodging in Nevada. On another trip the best we could do was to stay at the Rambler, an outdoor access motel that could easily be the scene of a horror film wherein the hatchet comes through the door while two scantily clad teenagers hover in the corner awaiting their cruel fate. In each bathroom at the Rambler instructions are posted for how to clean your fish, which is of great help to a group of 80 high school debaters.

On the other hand, several of my dearest pals have passed through this town, either as natives or as coaches. It grows good people. It's just, well, Nevada. Did I mention that the water smells of sulphur? It has for as long as I've been around. Eek. Nevadans claim you get used to it. Okay. Sounds probable.

I returned here today for--brace yourself--baseball. Sunny and 95 degrees, this is a far cry from the climate of my past experience here. Killing time between games in the air conditioning, my mom and I rolled into the local Walmart--obviously the number one draw of the metropolis. I was buying birthday gifts for two different girls, aged 3 and 7.  Nyds and I schlepped my wares to the "speedy checkout" lane. As I placed the first item--a pillow light in color--the cashier panicked. "You won't want to leave that up here for long!" She cried. What could happen, I wondered. Spontaneous combustion? Will the Walmart gods descend upon me? Is the counter coated with an infectious disease?

She nervously scanned the pillow and darted over to return it to the cart. Her urgency was startling. I half-expected men in Haz-Mat suits to surround us and detox the pillow.

"Um, where should I have put it?" Bitchy Nancy asked very slowly.

"Oh, yes, I'm sorry," the cashier began. "It's just that I can't remember the last time these lanes have been used and they just can't be clean and your pillow was light and I just didn't want it to get dirty because I just can't remember the last time these lanes were open. And who KNOWS when they were last cleaned. All kinds of stuff can collect on these counters and I didn't want your pillow to stay there for long so nothing would get on it. I wouldn't want anything to get on your pillow. Are those pillows comfortable? I've never had one like that before."

"It's a gift," I said through clenched teeth. Concerns over the cashier's (probably) undiagnosed OCD and Walmart's employee screening process floated through my mind. Foremost, however, was this:

Hey, employee of the month, maybe stop throwing the corporate powerhouse you work for under the bus, I'm thinking. Telling us how filthy this place is could get you killed. They might be listening, sister, simmer down.

"Okay," I said. I know I was speaking slowly and incredulously as if speaking to a young child. I stole a glance at Nyds. Her look validated the WTF hanging in the air.

As I placed my remaining items on the toxic surface between the two of us, I wondered, So I should avoid the alleged disgustingly dirty counter--so vile that it places in peril the cleanliness of purchases--but remain worry-free about the shopping cart? Did I miss the cart sterilization station on the way in?

While our cautious cashier adamantly continued her commentary on these newly opened lanes and the new slot on the credit card reader, she finished ringing up the birthday gifts I was on the verge of abandoning for want of escape. The last item bagged and paid for, I thought we were home free. I turned the cart which included a 6-foot foam noodle for the pool (a lovely gift, I know) sticking out to the side, but a Walmart greeter blocked my path. With a crazed look, I stopped. "Oh, excuse me," he said, moving less than an inch to the side. I had to put the cart on two wheels to edge past him, Nyds close on my heels. As we neared the parking lot, I heard Nydia's hallmark giggle bubble up behind me.

"What in the hell?" I cried. "Did that just happen?"

Yep, it happened. Could've happened in any Walmart anywhere, but it didn't. It happened in Nevada: in the same Walmart whose parking lot once showcased a showdown late one January night between myself and a short, bald school bus driver named Maynard who refused to move the bus even an inch if my exhausted and hungry debaters had even a drop of liquid or a morsel of food in their hands. Apparently, moving an inch isn't popular at the Nevada Walmart. (That was the least of Maynard's hangups, by the way. Male chauvinism was also close at hand. And I won the showdown. Maynard is lucky to be alive.)

Covered in dried sweat and ballpark dust, we are meandering home, toward our slice of civilization and showers that don't stink. It was a good day for baseball and for my little first baseman. However, whatever your day held, wherever you are, you can smile, sigh and say, "at least I wasn't in Nevada."

Friday, June 19, 2015

More than the Benedict



June 19, 2015

It's another day of seemingly endless rain. Were it not for the indoor plumbing and Netflix, I might think we were living in Old Testament times. As a solarholic/hot-temp-aholic, rainy days with nary a twinge of sunlight make me a bit punchy. I don't twitch and drool, but like any good addict*, I have to find a fix somehow, or at least a solid distraction.

In this case, my boy suggested an excellent course of action: breakfast together that doesn't come out of a box or from a drive-thru window. Drew and I used to breakfast semi-frequently when the kids attended schools across town that started an hour apart. The two of us would ease into our day after dropping off his beleaguered sister at middle school (poor Grace). There is nothing more precious than a little convo over potatoes smooshed into an oval shape or a drippy piece of sausage couched between fluffy "homemade" biscuit halves. But sometimes we sat down to the real deal.

For me, breakfast is the holy grail of meals. The day-to-day Nance would present all evidence to the contrary, as I tend to eat something fruity/yogurty/or cerealy over the kitchen sink while swigging an ice cold Diet Coke. Nothing jumpstarts the system and the psyche like something proven to rot out the insides or pickle you. (This post is taking on a self-destructive tone--see asterisk below--but it has been raining for 40 days and 40 nights...wait...).

My true love for breakfast was ignited when I discovered Eggs Benedict. My Papa French introduced me to runny eggs sopped up with bread, but I didn't really pledge my soul to this culinary delight until the Benedict. And even then, it was a special plate that sealed the deal: my best friend and I were ushered to a perfect Jewish restaurant named Brent's while visiting LA 16 years ago. Our tour guides were natives of the town and proved themselves gurus of incomparable meals out. A case full of cakes miles high greeted us at the front counter, but the all-day breakfast menu reeled me in.

It was there, among dear friends in the San Fernando Valley, that the gold standard of Eggs Benedict and I shook hands and subsequently pledged a lifetime of love one for another. I didn't ask to smoke a cigarette after the last bite (there were children present), but it would not have been out of the question.

Since that time, many other attempts at my Benedict have been made. First Watch in KC, St. Louis and Tulsa have all made a run at it, with variations on the theme that include turkey and avocado. My first taste there was in the presence of friends Judy and Chad. Judy listened to me order the Hollandaise sauce on the side and sighed, "What the hell, Nancy? What's the point without the sauce?" Judy really loves me.  The Tulsa edition of First Watch was on Mother's Day, the day after I ran a half-marathon.  Needless to say, I could have eaten my Eggs Benedict and the plates and the silverware and the piles of food on tables all around me.  I restrained myself.

Chris's on the Hill in St. Louis certainly deserves honorable mention.  There we go either on the way to or the morning after a Cardinals game with my folks. The last time we were there an old friend of Dad's stopped by and mentioned an investigation by the Feds into his (not Dad's!) finances, houses seized, surveillance...but no worries! He was jovial, I felt like I was on an episode of "The Sopranos," and I focused on my eggs. No one asked any questions.

But there is an old diner in downtown Springtown, believe it or not, that comes closest. 

Gailey's is old school: it has the counter, the metal tables and chairs, and the vibe that we know what we are doing, so let's everyone just remain calm. Not surprisingly, it was a stellar group of students who introduced me to this little gem. 

Two years ago, on the morning of Drew's first day of second grade and the first day of my last year of teaching (unbeknownst to me at the time), to Gailey's I introduced Drew. Drew ate a meal appropriate for someone heading to his day job as a lumberjack, rather than the perils of grade school, but that's yet another thing I love about him. He knows what he likes and eats it. And plenty. The boy has never met a link of sausage he didn't like, and patting his belly appreciatively at the end of a meal is an acknowledgement that the link did, in fact, satisfy.

This morning we braved the rain for another breakfast date. My Eggs Benedict were delivered to me like a work of art. I admired the plate for a bit before diving in, while Drew rolled his eyes and slurped up his biscuits and gravy as if they might be taken from him before he could lick the plate. Delicious, we agreed.

The images of Brent's, First Watch and Chris's and the company there kept clicked by as I looked over at my son. As is often the case, the eggs are always best when accompanied by the best. Friends, family, eggs, memories. Who needs the sun?



_________

*When I dined with my former students a couple days ago, Hannah (a textbook ginger) put an alabaster arm up next to mine. 

"You are so tan," she said. 

"I know," I said, resigned to my choices. "I'm trying to join Doug's race." (Doug is a lovely mix with a white mama and an African-American dad. He is self-described as a "white man trapped in a black man's body.")

"Are you worried about skin cancer?" Hannah asked.

"Eh," I replied, shrugging my shoulders. "I might not get it."

This met with an appreciative bwahaha from my dinner companions. But I'm sure we all know that--if and when the diagnosis comes--we will look back on my willful exposure and this conversation with shaken heads and regret. 

And another caveat--I know skin cancer is real and not funny. So no one who loves me and wears sunscreen or who has lost someone near and dear to this heinous disease needs to get their knickers all bunched up. Honestly. My tanorexia is totally under control. Yep, sure is. It is.

Thursday, June 18, 2015

The Supper Club




June 18, 2015


Last night I dined with three of my nearest and dearest former Vikings. Hannah, Chase and Doug were the core of a group of my students who helped me through the last years of my career not only as gifted competitors, but as friends. I was on my way out, they cared about me and I cared deeply about them, and we had the best time together. I have never laughed as much as I did sitting behind my desk with them surrounding it or gathered 'round a table in the cafeteria at any given tournament on any given weekend.  They were each exceptional performers.  Talent oozed from them, matched only by their devotion and competitive spirit.


Whatever happened during my last months at the helm, our mantra was "this is where we are." Referenced often was also the famous scene in the last episode of "The Office," when Andy Bernard reflects, "I wish there was a way to know you're in the good old days before you've actually left them." (https://youtu.be/C7qcFCTa1vw)  But we knew we were in them. And we knew things would never be the same.

As is often the case with students who leave, we promised we would stay in touch. Sometimes it happens, sometimes it’s sporadic, sometimes they’re really gone. With many alumni I have maintained treasured connection. But these three and I have made a habit of it: holidays, when Hannah is home from Mizzou, when their busy lives clear up, we make our little Supper Club happen. Things change, but when we get together, we breathe the air of the good old days.  

There is more to say and to write about this special crew (and that will come), but for now I will let the pictures speak for themselves :):).

"He must have known I'd want to leave you."
"No, he must have known you would always want to come back.
—JK Rowling, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows






Broken


June 18, 2015

A gifted, authentic evangelist I watched a bit in my twenties made this observation:  "When you are a Christian, your heart will break at the things that break the heart of Jesus."


We are all guilty of breaking the heart of God, and we are flawed, damaged human beings dependent on the grace of God to repair the breaks. At least I am.

God may not differentiate the severity of sins, but it is especially hard for me to resist that human need to scale wrongdoing. It's those actions filled with malice toward God and toward others that I find the most heartbreaking. As I've watched this horror unfold in Charleston, with innocents gunned down in cold blood while at church, my heart cracks open.

9/11, Columbine, Sandy Hook, Oklahoma City, the Germanwings flight...the list is long of moments like this. The hatred and the heartbreak are palpable. The greater tragedy, of course, is if our grief returns hate. So, what is there to do? "Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be the sons of your Father in heaven..." (Matthew 5:44-45). I imagine, though, that Charleston struggles with that today and maybe forever. It's fine to read it and believe it, it's another to live it.

The search for answers and justice will persist here on earth. But in the heaven on which I rest my faith, those victims are victims no more.

Tuesday, June 16, 2015

June 16 Nuggets

June 16, 2015


Okeedokee. I continue to troll around in my memory for my most-loved movie scenes. They are a wee bit long, but worth it. 

Spoiler alert--these clips give away chunks of plot.


"Pride and Prejudice"

Mr. Darcy and Elizabeth Bennett have misunderstood one another for this classic novel's length. When finally they each put aside the pride and the prejudice (hmmmm), this scene happens. Aside from watching Mr. Darcy walk and walk and walk, it is a breath-taker.



"Sleepless in Seattle"

Oh holy crap. Best chick-flick ever. Sam's wife has died. Jonah has no mama. And, scene:



"Shadowlands"

This movie changed me in a variety of ways. A crusty older theologian, CS Lewis finds love, but his love (Joy) is dying. The scene with "Jack" (CS Lewis, played by Anthony Hopkins) speaking to Joy's son is not only one of the most moving, but also among the best-acted scenes in my personal list of bests.



Pardon the "mom's dead" theme. The message in each of these perfect scenes is the love: want it, got it, had it, lost it, miss it, ache for it love. And since that's the whole point (or at least the bulk of the point) of this journey we are on, I appreciate it when cinema captures it truly.

Gotta love the movies.